2 words, -My Type
2 words, -My Type
Sometimes i feel as if
i wish i never were born…
simply cuz i will never know what it feels like
to have a complete family..
i feel as if my mother robbed me of what i needed in order
to be successful….how could you be so selfish smh
i never had that grandfather on my pops side
that looked after me…hell i dont even know my on pops..
i was never taught how to be a man
i was too busy doin the wrong thing
now bein all fucked up in the game is how i realized that
not someone showin me
and guidin me
NOT FUCKIN YELLIN AT ME
the fucked up part about life
is emotionless people
people that drowned self-depression
in everyday habbits
sometimes i wish i never had life
or this one..
but i will only have one…
but no matter how my future turn out
i will always wonder why..
not why me
why not me….
—YOURStruely
*plays BIGGIE’S Story to Tell
So pull up at the 7/11
its some nigga in a lexus beside me
dopeboy
then it was some niggas beside me in a white charger
the nigga hopped out the white charger
and came to the nigga in the lexus
my throat dry as hell
so i walk in the store
cop the 2 for 1 donut/2 for 3 gatorade deal
and 2 79 cent GAME cigarellos
boom
comes out the store
the SAME nigga
at the passenger window
blockin the way of my door
so I was like
scuse me
the dude homebody came up to him
and was like
“brooo, lil dude (he a bitch for that)
tryna get thru”
nigga stood up and was like
I DONT GIVE A FUCK NIGGA
so im like ……. sippin my drank
im like fuckit
i walk and squeeze beside the nigga
he moved (shockingly, i said scuse me tho)
and i got im my car
Moral of the story is
I realized from the get go
that he had a few oz’s of liquor in him
and instead of talkin shit
I thought about HIS situation
and compared it to mine
and jumped to action.
Thinkin from outside of the book
—Guess who said it
I realized today, that without a Woman -most males would be weak…A woman capitalizes the connection between hearts. The best feeling in the world to me is having no worries, and having someone who loves me just as much as I love them; And I love hard…Bottom line, I talked to me Sis Fiance/Baby’s father…he told me the realist shit…”I gotta wake up for the rest of my life..realizing she’s gone…never coming back”…I lost a sis…he lost the Love of his life…I cant die alone..
Rip Shylicia Rakal Timmons-Hopper
9/9/92 - 12/16/11
Bringin 96’ back
Today, I learned that my first cousin died….Growin up -Me, her, her sister, and My brother were all raised by my Grandma..so that was basically my sister. Laughed, fought, cried, slept in the same bed…Death never hit home this close for me because besides them 3 -My Moms and My Grandma is all I got as far as Family goes…thats why I’m havin a hard time adjusting to this…I seen people smiling, laughing, enjoying their day -but I’m thinkin lil do yall know my cousin died this Morning….I try not to Question Life and look at it as a blessing, simply because this world is so cold. I never understood until today that many people die everyday, and I will never know close to half of the familes that suffer the same pain im goin through…I just wanna be alone, no facebook, no social network in general…I just wanna have one last convo with her…but I cant..God Never Talks, Death is he only answer to the Mind-Boggling questions we ask about life….9/9/92 - 12/16/11
yea cuz im bout 2 have a baby boy. they say my due date is july 5 but i dont think ima make till then. hopefuly i will have it on your birthday or atleast close 2 it!! I will love 2 c u and money. i havent seen yall n so long! i no u done got taller and your voice got even deeper! lol. money baby looks just like him; forehead and all!lol. i hope my baby comes out lookin like me!!! lol. i wood like 4 u 2 meet my boyfriend/babyfather because u no u r like a brother 2 me. u and money. and i want yall 2 meet the man n my life!! well hit me back!! love u cuz
i love you too shyshy. Im glad to see you doin good and i want you to do right by that baby, cuz you know our generation gon make a difference. i believe in you shyshy i love you as well you know you aint my cuzzin, you my sister and i know we do need to see each other! imma try to come down there in august or sooner than that
ok cuz i cant wait.